10.03.2008

Nothing?, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!?!?

I have absolutely nothing to blog about today.

In fact, if you turn on the channel 12 news you will see two anchors, sitting there, awkwardly staring back at you with blank eyes and nothing to say.

The guy on channel 4 is so nervous and sweaty that it's entertaining, but in a creepy way. He just keeps muttering,"commercial...commercial...commercial?!" and wiping his brow with toilet paper (I think they ran out of tissues). Some is stuck to his forehead.

Maybe the world has stopped spinning? Nah, that wouldn't explain it...

Oh, and don't even bother to open up the newspapers. They are blank: empty, zip, zero, nada, zilch. No news, just page numbers in roman numerals for some reason.

The lady on channel 12 tried to start talking about the debate last night, but when she got to the "Pal.." part of Sarah Palin, she just threw up all over the counter.

There is no election coverage at all. FOX News keeps looping footage of 9/11 and CNN's Lou Dobbs and Wolf Blitzer are shouting at Anderson Cooper for seemingly having two last names.

Even the stock market is refusing to gain or lose any points. Rather than the standard numbers and figures scrolling on the boards, investors are staring at LED text that reads "Dear Congress: fucking do something."

So sorry guys, nothing to post today. I'm going back to bed.

Dave


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